Strategies to use at home to support your child

Maintain boundaries

Maintain clear and consistent boundaries so that the young person knows what is expected of them and what to expect from you.

Keep instructions simple and specific

Break them down if needed and use visual aids to help the young person understand what you want them to do.

Break tasks into smaller chunks with breaks in between to help the young person keep on task.

Give instructions calmly and slowly

Please note that some young person’s respond better when they are given a choice and some control over their environment.

For example, asking “Coat or shoes first?” when getting ready to leave the house.

Provide time

Allow the young person time to process the information.  It can help to give the information visually as well as verbally.

Positive instruction

A young person will understand instructions better if they are guided on what to do instead of what they should not be doing.

For example, if a young person is running when they should be walking you could say “Let’s walk now” instead of saying “Stop running” or “That’s a bad choice”.

Use visual aids

Visual aids can help, for example using pictures to show the young person what will happen throughout the day, or more simply what will happen ‘now’ and ‘next’.

Be clear

Make any changes clear to the young person in advance so that they can predict what is going to happen next. Visual aids can help with this.

Acknowledge effort

Praise and acknowledge the young person’s efforts when they are trying to do something; this helps to reinforce more of the positive.

Please note that some young people do not like to be praised.

Reward appropriate behaviour

Rewards work better than punishment at reinforcing behaviours you want the young person to repeat.

For example, offering extra iPad time for appropriate behaviour is much more effective and less distressing than taking iPad time away for inappropriate behaviour.

Non-urgent advice: Top tips

Guidance to be aware of when trying strategies:

  • When you start to use new strategies, you might see an increase in your child’s behaviours that challenge. This is normal and will usually settle down as you continue to consistently use the strategies.  However, if you feel that your child is extremely distressed or their behaviour has become unmanageable, please stop using the strategy.
  • Don’t feel disheartened if you don’t see any changes straight away. Change takes time and it might be several weeks before you start to notice any improvements.
  • Remember to celebrate all the successes you and your child make, especially the small ones!

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Page last reviewed: 12 July, 2024